Ms. 20 Something. I never really understood what SZA was saying in her song until recently. Granted when CTRL dropped I was 21; but somehow in one year, my 20's have become way more complicated. Thus making the song far more relatable. It feels like my 20-somethings have been filled with magical moments, and magnificent mistakes. Honestly, it's been a bumpy road into adulthood for me, and I don't think I am alone.
Something that has been hardest for me to tackle about adulthood is the fact I am not alone. I am not the first person to make an epic mistake. Not the only person who has crashed their first car. And not the only person to has struggled adjusting to life out of undergrad.
It's hard growing up. Period.
Below is an an open letter to myself and any other 20 somethings who may be struggling.
Dear 20 somethings,
You are unbelievably harder then I could have imagined. You have made me feel rejected, stupid, sad, anxious, and exhausted. I have worked more hours in a week then I ever imagined possible, while barely making minimum wage. I have had my heart hurt by men I thought were good for me. I have watched all my savings fly out my account because of mistakes I made. You have brought people into my life, just to remove them later.
You have given me the joy of owning my first car; and the pain of being run off the road into a tree. The excitement of my first full-time job, and the harsh reality check of working a fulltime job. You taught me how to be use my voice, and also showed me it's can be best to keep your mouth shut.
Everyday as a 20-something is a constant battle to grow, and learn. I can't lie... somedays you have won the battle. You have exhausted me, and beat me down to the point where all I have left is tears. But for some reason you keep giving me another chance. Everyday I wake up in these 20-something years, is another day for battle; and another chance to win. You are making me stronger everyday. I am thankful for the sad, anxious, exhausted, rejected moments you send my way... because they are showing me determination, work ethic, and strength, I didn't know I had in me.
So even though on some days I hate you. I hate you with a fiery passion, 20-somethings. I know you are making me into the woman I am meant to be and for that I am thankful. So thank you 20-somethings for the lessons, mistakes, and all the marvelous moments.
Pressure makes diamonds & I intend to shine.